​EXTREME VS. AMBIGUITY

To many people, life is formed by extremes. Black or white, sweet or salty, feminine or masculine, uninhibited or puritan, effeminate or a macho man. However, life is much more than that. Among black and white, there’s a whole range of colours.

14 February 2017  - 
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​EXTREME VS. AMBIGUITY

To many people, life is formed by extremes. Black or white, sweet or salty, feminine or masculine, uninhibited or puritan, effeminate or a macho man. However, life is much more than that. Among black and white, there’s a whole range of colours.

Would you opt for your dominant side, your submissive side or vice versa? Our advice is to change how you feel, so you are able to enjoy everything. Today on our beloved blog, we will talk about extremes and middle points because we like trying everything.

Women, men, or a little bit of both?

Being a hundred percent man or woman is one of the extremes dictated by our society. If someone is a woman, she can’t be a man or behave as one. And the same goes for men. However, the most successful men are those who don’t hide their sensitive side and the most successful women are determined and independent.

What about sex? Some clients of La Vie en Rose have confessed that their perfect escort is very feminine, but has sex as a man. “I like the escort I’m dating to behave as a slut, to have direct sex, porn, just like men want. I don’t want to play the fool when I date her. If I have paid her for some services, I want them to the fullest straight as an arrow. There are plenty of nightclubs to flirt.”

The escorts tell us that they like “very macho men who don’t hide their erotic, sensual and loving side.” In other words, many people think that the mix between feminine and masculine is the best!

Androgynes radiate sensuality

The word androgyne is composed by “andro”, which means man in Greek, and “gyno”, which means woman. The mix of both sexes. A woman with masculine traits or a man with clear feminine traits.

Marlene Dietrich, the star actress of Der Blaue Engel (The Blue Angel), a Josef Von Sternberg movie from the beginnings of the XXth century, was a good example to illustrate androgyny. She liked wearing tuxedos, smoking cigarettes holding them between the thumb and the index finger and hooking up with men and women, depending on her mood.

Marlene was a knockout blonde who fiddled around with her masculine side even in front of the cameras. Nothing like watching her movie, Morocco, to see how she subtly swap the feminine role with Gary Cooper.

David Bowie, the Brixton genius, always played with her sexual ambiguity. However, his marriage with the Somali top model Iman last for many years, but Bowie exploited his double emotion on the stage.

You only have to type his name on the Internet and see the legacy of his figure. David Bowie posed as a rockabilly, an alien or the most ambiguous human being on Earth. Sometimes, he shaved his eyebrows and wore tight clothing; others he weared an elegant suit. And, his geniality was always underneath all his faces.

Vanilla sex or fantasies

Vanilla sex refers to the sex you have that leaves you cold. Predictable, boring, with little pleasure. During it, people remind to do the washing, send a work e-mail, and even answer a Whatsapp message.

From it to the hottest fantasies, there’s a long gap. There are integral kinky people who need constant eccentricities to enjoy sex. For instance, one day they feel like tearing clothes during a passion onslaught; the following day, they feel like slapping someone on the face; the other day they feel like putting a cucumber in their ass; if they are very stressed, they may feel like practicing urolagnia and enjoying pee in their mouth.

If you are somewhere in the middle of both, welcome to the club of the majority! Filling our sexual life with some surprises and eroticism, new experiences and pleasure explorations is the most appropriate way to keep it alive, active and dynamic.

Dominatrix or submissive

In the BDSM case, the dominatrix or mistress and submissive roles are well delimited. In this fantasy, the important is to follow the rules. The dominatrix can’t be swept along by her slave and neither please him, nor lose ground in his favour. The mistress role is solid, hard. The dominatrix looks for her own pleasure through dominating and humiliating her partner. That role can’t be swapped during a BDSM session, neither after it’s over.

It works the same way for the slave or submissive. The lust and pleasure come from being humiliated and bullied by a mistress. The slave will only obey to the mistress, will only humiliate in front of a mistress. This role can’t be swapped, or all the fantasy would collapse.

In many cases, SM (sadomasochism) starts and become a long relationship in which they fully trust each other. Once the slave is handcuffed, blindfolded and a gag in the mouth, he is at the mercy of his mistress. She has blades, clamps, whips, spikes, ropes and different kinds of material to fulfill the fantasy.

It’s easy to understand that, if trust and experience aren’t solid, this situation can go wrong.

To sadomasochists, the balance and the role swapping doesn’t count very much. Dominants usually don’t like to be tied and punished. The same way that submissives don’t like to get hard and force the other to lick their boots, neither ordering immediate commands through a phone.

To sum up, extremes aren’t advisable. Everybody knows it, even Dalai Lama has said it several times. It may seem that extremes give us a sensation of power and certain exaggerated pleasure, but the real virtue is to get a balance.

14 February 2017  - 
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